News that makes us laugh, cry, or both

Username17 · Post by **Username17** » Tue Jan 26, 2010 8:29 pm

RiotGearEpsilon wrote:Christ, I gotta share that rape thing.

Don't ever say that.

-Username17

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Tue Jan 26, 2010 10:53 pm

You didn't know that?

One quarter of American Women will be raped in their lifetimes.

It is despicable. What's worse is that so little of it in the military is actually dealt with because they might 'ruin those young men's careers'.

-Crissa

TOZ · Post by **TOZ** » Tue Jan 26, 2010 11:06 pm

As a servicemember, let me be the first to say 'they already ruined their careers.'

Lago PARANOIA · Post by **Lago PARANOIA** » Wed Jan 27, 2010 12:48 am

Daiba wrote:Prison bans DND.

Also, that rape thing is horrific. Reminds me of this airforce forum I read last year where officers were bragging about how a large percentage of women started retracting their rape accusations after being subjected to harsh interrogation. Despicable.

You know, for as much shit people give modern prisons for 'coddling' prisoners, if you look at a prison movie from the past they look positively cozy compared to conditions we have right now.

I mean, take Cool Hand Luke for instance. That place seemed more like a camp than a prison. Don't get me wrong, it's a pretty awful place to live, but I'd much rather stay there than the places I see nowadays. Were people whining just as much about how 'soft' prisons back in those times?

Speaking of which, while I really liked the movie CHL and I understand that the protagonist comes off as some anti-establishment counterculture icon, to modern sensibilities he comes off as kind of a whiner. While two years in the joint would suck, if it was at that place it wouldn't be too bad at all. But then again I just wonder if it's the shittification of modern prisons.

CatharzGodfoot · Post by **CatharzGodfoot** » Wed Jan 27, 2010 2:07 am

Don't worry, Lago. If things keep going like they are, the majority of Americans will be in prison or jail. Assuming most of them aren't felons, that's a pretty big voting bloc.

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Wed Jan 27, 2010 7:35 pm

In Cool Hand Luke's era, they didn't much care if inmates died while doing work.

Modern jails tend to be overcrowded, if safer.

-Crissa

Nicklance · Post by **Nicklance** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 2:42 am

Apparently Australia has banned small breasted women from appearing on pornographic material, citing that its a simulation for child pornography.

Oh and female ejaculation is banned too because its abhorent.

Kaelik · Post by **Kaelik** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 3:15 am

Nicklance wrote:Oh and female ejaculation is banned too because its abhorent.

As opposed to male ejaculation? Aren't straight men supposed to be primary consumers?

PhoneLobster · Post by **PhoneLobster** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 3:29 am

I've said it before and I'll say it again.

The Australian Sex Party (who are right on top of this of course) is our only hope to stop this bullshit.

Its federal conservatives pulling these shenanigans as sops to the lunatic right fringe Family First that are doing this, until family first goes down or an opposing swing faction rises it won't stop.

Oh and this...

“It may be an unintended consequence of the Senator’s actions but they are largely responsible for the sharp increase in breast size in Australian adult magazines of late”

What next?

By next year will some Australian adult women be required to have boob jobs before being permitted to have sex without being arrested?

This one cries out for a topless feminist street march. I'm serious.

Maxus · Post by **Maxus** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 3:41 am

Just something I caught a glimpse of on Fox News before I changed it at work today (there's a silent war of MSNBC vs. Fox News watchers going on. MSNBC is winning, and I'm doing what I can to help that along).

I -think- it was Gleen Beck, but he said, "Don't watch Obama's stupid speech tonight. I'll watch it for you and tell you about it tomorrow."

No wonder they call the low-level conservatives 'sheep'.

But, on the plus side, I got a special-edition George Washington gold dollar in the place of a quarter out of a vending machine when I was getting a drink a few minutes later. So I guess the universe was doing a little to compensate me for the headache I got when I head-butted the nearest wall.

Lago PARANOIA · Post by **Lago PARANOIA** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 3:49 am

Crissa wrote:In Cool Hand Luke's era, they didn't much care if inmates died while doing work.

And this was different from the working life of the lower class... how?

I mean, granted, unions were stronger then but the whole worker and consumer safety revolution won't be happening for a good while.

Lago PARANOIA · Post by **Lago PARANOIA** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 3:58 am

All right, I just gotta ask because I only trust you guys with this delicate question.

Female ejaculation: possible as depicted, real but exaggerated in porn, or mostly/completely fictional?

I don't need any damn pictures or anecdotes or any of that, just a straight answer.

Maxus · Post by **Maxus** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 4:06 am

Lago PARANOIA wrote:All right, I just gotta ask because I only trust you guys with this delicate question.

Female ejaculation: possible as depicted, real but exaggerated in porn, or mostly/completely fictional?

I don't need any damn pictures or anecdotes or any of that, just a straight answer.

Er, real but usually exaggerated, I think. You -might- find some lady who can do a pornlike orgasm, but I'm sure you can also find a guy with twelve-inch superpenis or some woman with a body type that might be found, say, inside an sourcebook with the title of Exalted.

TarkisFlux · Post by **TarkisFlux** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 4:18 am

My (potentially faulty) memory of college GE course on sex and personal experience leads me to say that it is possible as depicted but really fucking rare.

Nicklance · Post by **Nicklance** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 5:09 am

Kaelik wrote:
Nicklance wrote:Oh and female ejaculation is banned too because its abhorent.
As opposed to male ejaculation? Aren't straight men supposed to be primary consumers?

I don't know what world Australia is in anymore.

This is the news site link if you're looking for it. The article about banning of small breasts.

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 5:35 am

Can one of you Americans just get your government to declare war on us over here and completely glass the country? I would be most appreciative* if you did.

*More dead than appreciative, actually.

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 6:22 am

I'm afraid of certain positions with my spouse. I'm not into waterboarding.

-Crissa

Username17 · Post by **Username17** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 6:43 am

While women do in fact have prostates, they are normally little things, just a few cells across, that never develop past the embryological structure that he substantially larger male prostate develops from. So most women do not produce the kinds of volume of ejaculate that men do. There are however a number of things that can happen that can produce a geyser of fluid. Most specifically, vaginal secretions are essentially extracellular fluid that move into the vagina due to permeability during arousal. The reservoir of fluid thus is "the entire body" so no woman is ever going to run out. With the right kind of muscular tightness, the vagina can basically fill up with vaginal fluid, which during orgasm will be squeezed out. This can be mistaken for peeing, but of course the fluid tastes totally different.

Anyway, on to news:

Democratic Senator's Phone tapped by conservative activists working with American spies.

-Username17

Draco_Argentum · Post by **Draco_Argentum** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 7:19 am

Hey small breasted women, anyone who finds you attractive is a pedo.

Now there a message we should be sending. Why do people vote retard?

Akula · Post by **Akula** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 7:25 am

Solidarity.

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 7:32 am

I want to get a gov. job as a random breast tester now, to test to make sure random women are obeying the law regarding their bust size :3

Nicklance · Post by **Nicklance** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 7:39 am

In that logic, any kid with huge boobs can be considered as a legal adult. Since in no way will she propogate pedophilia with her breasts.

koz · Post by **koz** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 8:13 am

Draco_Argentum wrote:Hey small breasted women, anyone who finds you attractive is a pedo.

Now there a message we should be sending. Why do people vote retard?

Given that my girlfriend and pretty much all my exes have had A-cup breasts, I find the Australian government's position on this completely fucktarded. Honestly, I suspect the porn industry might have some very, ahem, well-endowed lobbyists pushing these policies? Well, that or whoever makes silicone.

Neeeek · Post by **Neeeek** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 6:35 pm

FrankTrollman wrote: Anyway, on to news:

Democratic Senator's Phone tapped by conservative activists working with American spies.

I believe they are now claiming they were trying to shut down all the phone lines to the building, to see what the Senator's office would do. (Oh, and, the US Secret Service has offices in that building. Making this possibly subject to the federal terrorism statute, as well as the various statutes that protect law enforcement.)

I'd have to check, but I'm fairly sure that holds a bigger criminal penalty than what they were accused of, so I'm not sure why that's the story they're going with.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Fri Jan 29, 2010 4:15 am

http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2010/1/27/

yeah, lord forbid prisoner's fantasize about escape... it's so much better when they actually act it out... keeps the lads sharp